The High Rock Challenge 2012    

     It's almost 11:00 PM and I am in still in my work clothes. It has been the usual, hectic day that starts out with the "easy" part:  actual work (in my case, dentistry) and ends up with not the necessarily "hard" part, but it is most certainly grueling:  driving my three girls to all their after-school activities and then waiting for them to emerge from these said activities.  This can last anywhere from three to five hours.  Tonight happened to clock in more toward the latter.

     Anyway, work, as I mentioned, is the easy part.  One of my pedo patients commented to me that she could NOT believe that I had competed and actually finished the High Rock Challenge over the weekend (having seen this newsflash all over my Facebook wall, proclaimed by me, of course, more out of shock than wanting to boast).  This has been the conventional sentiment by my friends, family, staff, and fellow softball moms with whom I've chit-chatted since the race's conclusion this past Saturday afternoon.

     As a matter of fact, I'm glad to report that my thighs have regained feeling in them as of this morning, 72 hours after the 8-mile adventure race.  Not bad for an old lady, whose birthday marked yet another year last week, right?  I must tell you that I kind of was astounded myself that I did it, and am very much pleased with finishing the race, comprised of mostly buff and svelte 1,200 participants, with a median age of I would say 25.

     I raced with my very good friend, Rob, an attorney, older than I, and very outdoorsy (yes, participants in the High Rock Challenge must race in teams of two).  This came in very handy indeed, especially in one of the challenges that peppered the 8-mile course through the woods.  This particular challenge involved getting heavy-duty zip-lock tied-together at the wrist, and racing as a twosome for one entire mile!  And if that weren't bad enough, one of us had to be carrying a ten-pound bag of sand on his or her shoulder.  Thank heaven that was NOT me.  I kind of felt bad for my good, old partner about that part, but hey, God didn't give big broad shoulders to men for nothing!



     And if THAT weren't enough to make a participant vomit, the challenge also involved a sort of scavenger hunt, wherein our team, aptly named "The Whole Tooth and Nothing but the Tooth"  (clever, for a dentist/lawyer team, right?), wherein we had to find the three numbers of a combination that would open a padlock, traipsing all over the 120-acre woods (well, ok, just a section of it), nailed onto a tree of five spots you had search for, one of them in the middle of a swamp (seriously!) with only a very rudimentary map the sadistic event organizers drew up, with what I thought looked like their feet.

     So anyway, my partner was quite good at this whole thing, and we were three for three in the scavenger hunt, swiftly finishing this part, which was after we had to scale a steep Mount Moses, and right before I had to be blindfolded and then paint onto his face a goatee, a mustache, and lamb chop sideburns. I kid you not. You'd think there was a million dollars at the end of this race but there wasn't.  Just a great big party, studded with vegetable wraps and Voss water, and potato chips, apples, protein bars, massage stations, and great, big garbage cans into which most of the participants threw their muddied socks and sneakers which had all seen better days prior to the race.

     If only the High Rock Challenge involved the math/algebra sheet that Rob and I did in 5 seconds flat, we would have been OK.  But there was KAYAKING!  Did I mention the kayaking?!?  Life vests on and oars in hand, I was quite terrified to actually tip over during the race, embarrassing myself, my partner, my family.  So after plopping myself into the kayak, which was quite wet and very slick from the hundreds of racers before me, I steadied my lower body, back and buttocks, and rowed...  When we had encircled the entire course mapped out for us kayakers/crazies, it was the most amazing and exhilarating feeling ever.  What a high I got, really from just accomplishing NOT embarrassing myself!





     There was also an obstacle course thing, where we were required to scale this climbing-wall type-thing with netting that one had to body-roll across (there was no body roll for me, though.   All I can think about at that moment, in all honesty, was that my three young daughters needed me, and who would make their lunches this week, should I fall through the netting and plunk down to the ground with a great, big thud?).  So there was butt-walking across this netting, at which my partner Rob shook his head in disgust, and chuckled. But, hey, I'm alive! 

     Too bad there was lots of crawling through sewer pipes and rock-hopping through moss-covered gigantic stones and squat-thrusts and going knee-deep in a swamp to retrieve a padlock combination cover, because I would have loved to bring along my DSLR camera, instead of just snapping a few shots throughout the 8-mile race. 

     But really the memory is stored in the granddaddy of all cameras: my brain. And my heart. This race proved that even though I finished the race in double the time of many of the participants, I am almost triple the age of some of them, and I was NOT in their company when they were falling by the wayside with twisted ankles and sprained wrists from falling.  Haste makes waste. Slow and steady wins the race. I was reminded that the best things in life are free (the race registration fee, excepted, of course) and that Motrin is a girl's best friend.